Don’t have a lot of time to blog anymore 😦

Isabel started kindergarten

And we put her in the Mandarin Chinese immersion classroom

Around the same time, my husband starts dealing with burn out and struggling with his faith. And we hit a hard spot in our marriage. We are in counseling. He even thought about divorce because he was so burned out and felt like maybe that would give me and the kids a chance to go where we want and be happy. He was making no sense and I was completely blind sided by it all. But we are not divorcing.

I have an ultrasound Wednesday to check for ovarian cancer. I have a strong family history of it and am now having symptoms.

I am mentally and physically exhausted

Competitive dance season has started. The kids keep me busy!

Which one?

Which swim suit do I keep and which one do I return? I bought the pink and grey one because it is Garrick’s favorite. I am torn between these two and they are so different from each other.

Sneak preview

This is a pic of me trying on a bikini five weeks after my tummy tuck

25 Things I Want My 4 Girls To Learn:

1. Keep up with your finances.  Don’t let things get away from you financially.  (We use computer software, but find what works for you!)
2. With your money: spend, save, and give.  Don’t forget to give.  Find a church AND a charity you are passionate about and give.
3. When you get married, you never have “my money” and “his money”.  You have “our money”, unless mutually agreed upon.
4. You are beautiful.  Just. the. way. you. are.  Your straight hair is beautiful.  Your curly hair is beautiful.  Your blue eyes are beautiful.  Your brown eyes are beautiful.  Your long legs are beautiful.  Your short legs are beautiful.  Just the way you are is beautiful.  But, yes, you do have upkeep.  Cut your nails, cut your hair.
5. Wear a smile.  It’s the best accessory.
6. Your skin is your largest organ.  Take care of it.  Avoid parabans and sulfates.  It’s worth the extra money.
7. Wear sunscreen.  (nonchemical ones, but in a bind, chemical ones are better than nothing)
8. Eat your fruits and vegetables.  Every day.
9. Drink lots of water.
10. Sodas, while tasty, are loaded with calories, carbs, sugars, caffeine, and chemicals. 
11. Be kind.
12. Don’t just buy sneakers because they are cute.  Use them.  Exercise.  Find a way of exercise you love and do it.  Dance.  Tumbling.  Karate.  Soccer.  Basketball.  Running.  Walking.  Ellipetical.  Weight lifting.  Cycling.  Try to do a variety.
13. A pedicure can make you feel girly when you aren’t feeling so girly.
14. Give of yourself.  Give your time and your talents.  But, don’t spread yourself too thin.
15. Sing.  Even, if out of tune.
16. Laugh.  Laugh loud.
17. Dance.
18. Your heart will get broken.  By a friend.  By a boyfriend.  Spend some time crying about it.  It’s okay.  But, don’t let it consume you and don’t cry too long.  You will get over it.
19. Be a good friend.  Don’t abandon your friends for a boyfriend.  Find a way to incorporate both.
20. I will always be your mother.  Call me-when you need help, and when you don’t.
21. I will always love you.  No. matter. what.
22. You will make some bad choices.  These things do NOT define you.  What floods your heart is what defines you.  Not some fleeting moment.
23. Birth control is always available!!!!!
24. You should learn to cook, at least a few meals, especially ones that are healthy, tasty, and don’t require too much time.
25. Always do your best.  Yes, do your best in school, even if your best isn’t an “A”.  Take pride in your work.

Bully update

So the little girl that had been picking on Caroline in dance was not at class yesterday. While I am relieved that she was not there for Caroline’s sake, I am still worried about Xxxxxx. I know how important dance is to my kids. I cannot imagine someone taking it away from them. They would be absolutely devastated. If something is going on at home… Whether it be a rift between parents, parental abuse, molestation, or sibling abuse… I would hate if dance was the one place she felt safe, and now she is suspended. I don’t know her last name or else I would look up a way to contact mom. And I never got to speak to mom at the studio because they kept having to address issues with her. Sigh… Well, yesterday Caroline got her costume that was being altered for her ballet dance to “the mad hatter tea party”.

Bullying

I don’t know what to do and am looking for advice…

In the beginning of the dance season, Caroline’s dance teacher told me another girl was picking on Caroline. Caroline had not mentioned it to me at that point and the dance teacher said that Caroline never acted like it bothered her. The dance teacher said she would take the little girl and put her away from the other students. She also said that Caroline never instigated any of the comments and Caroline never retaliated.

At one point in December, when I picked her up, Caroline told me, “xxxxxx said bad words to me!” I asked her what bad words and she said she couldn’t remember. I asked her if she bad words back to xxxxxx and she said she did not. I the praised her and told her that she was a good girl for not saying bad things back. And gave her a big hug! The dance teacher said xxxxxx picked on caroline but caroline didn’t say anything back and just did what she was supposed and xxxxxx was put in time out and not given a lollipop.

Since then, I have seen the dance teacher talking to xxxxxx mom after class. Some days it is she had an ok day. Most the time it is: we have to figure something out!

This past Tuesday, I get a report from the girls since I am still recovering…

Xxxxxx pushed Caroline! My husband reported xxxxxx was screaming and kicking in the corner of the room during pick up.

I asked Caroline what happened. She told me that xxxxxx came up and pushed her. That she called for the dance teacher, who said “no, no, no!” Then picked up xxxxxx and put her in the corner and xxxxxx did not get a lollipop.

My husband emailed the dance teacher and asked if Caroline was in any way responsible. We were told that Caroline was not doing anything wrong and that the situation should be handled by the following day.

It hurts to hear that my child is being hurt by words and physically now by someone else. She doesn’t act like it really bothers her, but how can it not? I don’t know what to do other reassure her that it’s not her, we don’t use words or push back, etc. I have not confronted mom since the dance teacher has already.

Recovery is painful but will be so worth it!

I had my hernia repaired and decided to get a tummy tuck while I was at it. I am so sore. This better be worth it . They cut off four pounds of skin! I can’t wait to get off these compression garments and see what it looks like!

Getting my tummy tucked on march 14! Can’t believe I am actually doing it!!!

I did it!

I have a consult with two different plastic surgeons! One of theirs staff recommended I lose 30 pounds to achieve better results. Um… I have been trying! I will be so upset if that’s the answer I get after my consults…. Lose more weight. I eat okay, exercise four to six days a week, and have stalled out about a year ago. Hubby won’t let me get implants at the same time-boo!!!!